National Lampoon: How To Be A Hipster

"We are a ubiquitous force. We’re in your local Starbucks, listening to music. Afterward, we might be in your local music store, shopping for movies. And who’s that in your local movie theater, about to head across the street for coffee? Bingo. Us. As busy as we are, you wonder how we find time to be so directly with it. Because you desire to be with it, too. But let’s face facts: you can’t put your finger on it. You wouldn’t even be able to choose it out of a lineup of knockoff Louis Vuitton luggage. Hypothetically, if it were on a train headed northeast leaving San Francisco at 5:00 p.m., and at 6:00 p.m. you left on a train headed southwest out of Des Moines, you still wouldn’t be cool. You’re from Iowa. Keep that chin up friend, however, for I am about to share some knowledge. Welcome toHipsterology 101Our slogan: “There’s always room for a few more lucky souls at the very precipice of the fashion lifestyle ladder.” It’s a bit long, but in this day and age who has time for short slogans? “Not you, nor I, nor anyone else I can think of,” is what I always say." (more at link)